24 years

24 years yesterday...

My love, my reason for being turned 24 yesterday. My heart ached to be with him as I knew he sat alone on his birthday. He'd been away in Cali for work for the past two weeks...the longest we've ever been apart. He sat in the LA airport alone as he waited for his flight...alone as his flight delayed, and delayed and delayed. I fought back tears as he gently told me he wasnt going to be making it home until the next morning...that my plan to celebrate the one hour of his birthday we had together wasnt going to happen. His delay in the flight caused him to miss his connection. He was stuck in Atlanta on his birthday. And I wanted to cry. I'd held myself together for two weeks. The emptiness that I felt when we was gone I'd convinced myself I could handle for two weeks. Yesterday I began to fall apart. My heart was in California sitting in an airport. I wanted him home.

I'm not an emotional person. Growing up I was very "inward" so to speak. I kept everything inside me and in my journal. I didnt show pain, I didnt open up to others when I was hurting. It was me and my Father. Then Andrew swept me away. God used him to open my heart, to break down my emotional barriers. He became everything I ever wanted and needed, everything I prayed for since I was a little girl, and even more that I didnt. He became my journal; the rock that keeps me from flying away; he understands me when I dont quite understand myself. He loves me more than I thought anyone ever could. Ask around: I'm not emotional; I'm not fragile. Ask Andrew: I have a heart that's easily broken...I'm easily broken. He is my protector, my best friend. He's my calm, my compass, and my punching bag. He's the rock to my kite; he allows me to be whatever it is that I need to be.

Yesterday Andrew turned 24. 24 years he's walked this earth, God shaping him. 12 years ago my heart quickened, my face flushed as I had a crush on the cute guy in church...2 years ago, that same cute guy in church asked to be forever at my side, to weave his life into my own until our last breath. 1 year and 3 months ago today my heart changed as we declared our vows to one another. Yesterday Andrew turned 24 and I couldnt be there with him to celebrate. Today Andrew is home. Today, and the rest of the week, we'll celebrate his birthday as I attempt to make it up to him that I wasnt able to be with him on his birthday.

Happy Birthday my love...welcome home.

Thorne Family Photos

I posted a Sneak Peak a while back of the Thorne family. And today I realized that I never posted the full post! How horrid of me! So, to remedy that situation, I'm posting the Thorne family awesomeness now!

So here's Terry, Jessica, Sydney, Madison, Riley, and Reagan. {and if I spelled your names wrong, I'm truly sorry!! there are so many ways to spell those names so I picked my favorites!}

Dwell in Possibility...

Cassie

Wedding: Nikki & Jeremy

Dont rain yet, dont rain yet, dont rain yet! That was the common prayer of everyone at the Emerald Grande this past Friday. Andrew and I arrived braced for a torrential downpour and crossed our fingers. But as seems to be a theme with weddings we shoot, God holds off the rain until just the right moment. An overcast ceremony made for some AMAZING photos! I was nervous at first of not having the fiery glow of the sun as it set over the horizon but I'm so incredibly pleased with the result of Nikki and Jeremy's wedding!

Nikki was one of my first brides. {shhhh, I didnt admit that!} Not one of my first weddings but she was one of the first brides I ever met in person starting our photography business. I was scared out of my mind. What if she didnt like me? We'd emailed but what if she met me in person and decided to go with another photographer? Nikki and her mom met us in Panera and we hit it off. Oh, I was insanely nervous rambling the entire time but we clicked...and I desperately wanted to shoot her wedding!

Fast forward to last weekend. Fabulous vendors ranging from Diva Productions, Patti Bilbo from A Perfect Day Florist, and BBoy Productions made for an amazing event! I followed Nikki throughout her day in awe of her energy. She was excited and put together; a smile never leaving her face. The dynamic between the bridal party was incredible! I went through more memory cards at this wedding than ever before. The bright colors, the hazy blue grey skies, the candy bar at the reception, I WAS IN LOVE.

So Nikki, thank you for allowing me to be part of your day. I hope you fall in love with your images the way we fell in love with you and Jeremy at your wedding. And thank you for making me cry. Yes, I cried at your wedding as I watched you cling to your daddy and dance to "Somewhere Over the Rainbow". After we left your wedding, I drove to my dad's house and hugged him tight as I whispered 'I love you'. Thank you for that; for showing me that time with my dad is precious.

Dwell in Possibility...

Cassie

I think this next one is my absolute favorite from any wedding EVER!

















One of my all time favorites of the day...

Sneak Peak: Nikki & Jeremy

Those of you that follow me on twitter know that Andrew and I have been working on rebranding for quite sometime now. Normally, this would be a somewhat "easy" process, but unfortunately for Andrew and BishFish Illustrations: I'm complicated, fickle, and creatively minded. Translation: I change my mind on designs, logos, and color schemes on an hourly basis. BUT! We've nearly got everything narrowed down to begin the designing process on our new site and blog. We have a new funky font and the look we're going for so on Saturday, hopefully everything will be finalized and we can begin pushing for our launch date! Hopefully...

I thought it best to take a break from the colors, the layouts, and the designs and share some of the Wildy AWESOME photos sitting in Lightroom right now begging to get out! This one is from Nikki and Jeremy's wedding this past weekend. More to come on then soon but for now, enjoy the sneak!

Dwell in Possibility...
Cassie

{I think this is my all time favorite from the wedding! I think...}

Reach Out

So, I'd promised a few entries back that I would be blogging about Bethany Dillon's new cd. The new CD launched yesterday {I think} and it's been on my iPod playing ever since. I thought this one would be like the others in the sense that they knock me to my face before a Holy Lord and draw out the part of me that thrives in pouring over scripture, in writing, in music, in thought. It's funny how God works! I thought this CD would impact me, but I wasnt prepared for how.

I've always found a familar tone underlying all of Bethany Dillon's CDs. She references stories in the Bible that seem to have gotten lost along the way of my childhood. For years I wanted to be Bethany Dillon. Okay so not BE her but ever since I was little I was writing, I wrote stories, lyrics...when I began playing piano I wanted to write songs. Bethany's CDs brought out that desire in me: the desire to grab my old journals with unfinished songs, brush off the dust from my piano and guitar and sit before my Father. God seemed to have given her the gift of speaking directly to my heart and I felt like her CDs were created for me, as if I was the only one alive that had ears to hear the truth and inspiration behind her lyrics. I listened to the new CD Stop and Listen with bated breath, waiting for everything to hit me and send me into a whirlwind of inspiration. But God had other plans.

I've been listening to Stop and Listen for two days. For two days I've felt like a bug in a jar. I feel like God has me...I'm held there in the palm of His hand and He's just waiting. He's watching me as I squirm under His gentle loving gaze... He waits for me to stop talking, to stop moving, to stop stressing over the insane to-do list I've created for myself as of late, to just be still so he can open the lid to my jar. I watched a video on youtube last night: an interview with Bethany Dillon about her new CD. Something shes said nearly brought me to tears and to fall on my knees right there in my office and beg to hear from my Father. "...learning to choose the good portion...the simplicity of what I'm called to do.His call is really simple and really radical; just to stop and listen."

The song Stop and Listen seems to have spoken to my heart first from this CD. "too many days I feel like I run on empty. I dont pay much attention until I crash and burn...I'd be a fool to forfeit the chance to take a moment for you to rise like the dawn over my cold tattered heart. Find me when I stop and listen."

Forgive my weakness.